Thursday, November 24, 2011


Pardon my exuberance, but I love Thanksgiving.  It has always been one of my favorite holidays, probably because it centers on love, family, and God.  I find it interesting that it is a federal holiday, established by proclamation of President Abraham Lincoln in 1863.  Today's federal government goes out of its way to portray itself as non-religious and totally secular, even to the embracing of the religion of humanism.  President Lincoln's attitude was that even in this dark time of a great civil war, we have much to be thankful for to God Almighty.

I have much to be thankful for -- health, family, place to live, etc.

I have to admit that I am not always thankful for being transgendered.  I mean, come on now, there have been times, especially in the past, that I have wished that part of my life miraculously dissappeared into thin air.  I see lots of insanity happening in this scenario.  I'm biologically a guy who likes to dress like a woman and mentally picture myself as a complete woman.  That's strange.  Why is that?  I don't know!  Further, many people are offended at seeing a man dressed as a woman.  Why should they care what I am wearing?  That's strange.  Why is that?  I don't know!  They see an actual woman wearing a pretty blouse and slacks and think nothing of it.  I wear the same pretty blouse and slacks and they say "You pervert!"  That's strange.  Why is that?  I don't know!  I'm not wearing anything obscene or immoral, yet I am overly, downright paranoid concerned about my clothes and overly value the false judgement of people I don't even know.  That's strange.  Why is that?  I don't know.

One item that has helped me in my personal life, especially these past few years, is trying to follow St. Paul's instructions when he wrote to give thanks in everything (I Thess. 5:18, i think).  When you read the book of Acts, you read that Paul experienced a lot of hardships in his life, like getting thrown into prison, being shipwrecked, being stoned, etc.  Yet it never slowed him down in his work for God, and you never see him having a pitty party, table for one.  Whatever happened to him, he felt it happened for a reason, and he ascertained that reason and continued on from there.

I've asked myself recently what it must be like as a "normal" guy to see a pretty gal.  I can't for the life of me really guess what he must be thinking, because no matter how strongly I may be attracted to her, I still have those other thoughts about how I wish I was as pretty, or if those shoes come in my size.  Well, praise the Lord, at least I live in a country where I can do that without fear of the police arresting me and taking me away for re-education or worse.  Thank the Lord I am free to assemble and converse with fellow transgendered people.  And I praise the Lord for the women He has brought into my life because I think my transgenderism gave me an insight and appreciation of these beautiful beings that no "normal" man could ever have or enjoy.

St. Paul said in all things give thanks.  Give it a try.  I can vouch that it helps.


Wednesday, November 2, 2011

November Updates

Sorry for not posting much lately. I've been in mourning for my Detroit Tigers.... Only time can heal that loss....

Speaking of baseball (and professional sports in general), I recently became aware of the great inroads women have made in the area of sports apparel. When I was younger, sports apparel was made and marketed towards men. When women wanted to wear a sports jersey, they usually had to buy one made for the guys or borrow one from their boyfriend or husband. Those dark, caveman days have come to a close. I found all sorts of cute and feminine clothes in the professional sports gift shops. To ease my pain over the Tigers, I'm planning to order some Red Wings merchandise to see me through the winter, and no, I will not be ordering the Red Wings bikini.

Point of clarification -- I'm not a big ol' jock. I'm closer in size to the cheerleaders, and quite proud of that fact, thank-you very much.

Yesterday, while doing a little shopping, I saw some television sets displaying an episode of The Doctors. I've never really seriously watched the program although it looks like an interesting show. This particular episode was about the headline some time ago about a man giving birth to a child. The man was a female-to-male transexual. I'm assuming this person was in the process of transitioning when he got pregnant, and then finished transitioning as he looked very manly on the program. The volume was not on, so I could only see the video.
At one point, the cute doctor (don't know her name, but she's an OB/GYN) used a large computer video screen to show the effects of testosterone on the female body. A 3-D female body appeared on the screen, followed by a hypodermic needle that was labeled testosterone. As I said, I couldn't hear what they were saying. The model was injected and the camera zoomed to her face where she began growing whiskers. I'm assuming this is one of the first effects of testosterone. Then there was a cut-away view of the skull and the brain was highlighted. I don't know what testosterone does to the female brain, but I imagine it shrinks it down to the average male size and IQ. It was then that I remembered I wanted to buy a new pair of house slippers and began aimlessly wandering off in that general direction.

Television is not only very education, but it can be very entertaining for my autogynephilia. One of the Hispanic television networks is constantly airing a particular Snickers candy commercial. I don't speak Spanish and don't know very many famous Hispanic television stars, but the commercials are very similar to the ones that air here in the states. In the commercial, a young woman wearing a short orange dress and dark leggings is on a bicycle at a bike/skate park. She yells out to her friends, then pushes off, zooming down to the bottom of the pool where she looses her balance and falls off the bike. She sits on the pavement for a moment complaining about the pain while her two friends stand over her. She stands and is obviously annoyed at their lack of sympathy. One friend hands her a Snickers. She takes a bite, and the next time you see her, it is a guy wearing an orange shirt and dark pants.

It's a cute advertising campaign for the candy company, but if their candy bars could really change you from a woman back into a man, I would seriously consider never eating another one again.