Tuesday, September 13, 2011

Congratulations, Miss Angola!

I was riveted to the set last night, watching the Miss Universe pageant.  I know most guys like to leer at pretty girls, but I don't think most guys openly watch beauty pageants like I do.  I love the gowns, the way the clothes fit, their poise, and their hair and makeup.  Some folks might think I'm brave in admitting all this, but for the next several months when I watch television I'll be wearing my favorite Red Wings sweatshirt and waiting for the first octopus to be thrown on the rink.  It takes several months of hockey to balance out one night of beauty pageant viewing male/female wise.  Let's face it -- the Bible clearly endorses balance and temperance in our lives.

If I've mentioned this before, I apologize, but one year I watched the Miss U.S.A. pageant with an actual former beauty pageant contestant.  I won't give any specifics, but she had been a serious contestant in some major pageants.  Eventually, we got to discussing the individual contestants and the subject of "tricks of the trade" came up... like strategic use of tape so the clothes hug the body at just the right places, products you would never consider using as makeup, etc.  We had a great time and I have never forgotten that evening.

Later, it occurred to me that all women, to a lesser degree, try some of these "tricks" in their lives. Who hasn't dated a woman who wore a padded bra or met an acquaintance sans her makeup and mistaken her for a total stranger.  The "tricks" range from extreme like cosmetic surgery to minor like manicures and eye lashes.

Being transgendered, I like to think I have something of a dual outlook on the situation.  Part of me marvels that I have never complimented a woman on her eye lashes when out on a date, and part of me seriously envies those same lashes.  Being transgendered, I should take advantage of my meager knowledge of all things feminine and specifically compliment a woman on her outstanding eye lashes, yet the male side finds that as just too womanly a thing to know, and so I can never admit that I have the knowledge to compliment her on her handiwork.

Still later, it occurred to me that whenever I occassionally crossdress, I definitely use all the tricks of the trade that I can find.  Hairs are plucked, legs shaved, waist cinched, T&A padded, and Max Factor industrial-grade applied.  I probably go as crazy over preparations as many of those beauty pageant contestants.  The biggest difference is that they get to start as female.


Sunday, September 11, 2011

September 11, 2001

(John 11:35)  Jesus wept.

Thursday, September 8, 2011

ftm notes

Saw some promotional video for Chaz Bono's appearance on Dancing With The Stars yesterday.  I must admit that I think Chaz makes for a very nice looking young man.  If I didn't know any better, I'd think he had been a man all his life.  I've seen him on a few talk shows lately as well and thought he made a very good representative of the transgender community.  His mother is obviously very proud of her child, and I think if he were still alive, Chaz's father would be equally proud.

I know ftm transsexuals are fewer in number than mtf transsexuals, but I have always felt it was easier for them to, for lack of a better term, to "pass".  Perhaps as a mtf transgendered person, I'm more critical when it comes to looking like a woman.  The few times I completely dress-up, I go all out for the most realistic female look possible, but always end up admitting that only surgery and hormones could ever come close to making me look the way I wish to look.  And I don't intend any harsh or critical remarks towards my tg girlfriends, but I often find myself thinking the same thing about them, like she might be able to pass if she didn't have such a big male nose, or her beer belly completely gives her away.  Think of it as "gay-dar", only for me it's "tg-dar", and that actually makes no sense.

I found Chaz's mannerisms completely in synch with his male personae, but was still surprised when I saw him dancing.  He seemed to be having a great time, and carried himself well as a man.  The idea occurred to me that dancing could be a wonderful way of developing feminine moves and mannerisms.  Chaz, as the man, gets to support his partner whenever she dips or twirls or jumps into the air.  If you ask me, the girl gets the toughest yet prettiest dance moves.  I'd try it in a heart beat, if only I could find a six-foot tall woman to dance with.

Anyway, I've never watched Dancing With The Stars, but I hope Chaz does well.  Perhaps I'll fantasize about being his dance partner.

Hmm... just reviewed my latest blog entries.  Where the heck was I in August?